Public Transit: The On the Go Non-Fiction Stories

Dear Guy with Crazy Messy 90s hair,

I applaud you for making your time useful at the bus stop and decide to run laps around the bus station.

I would join you but I prefer not to be hot and sweaty on a hot and stinky bus. Besides you look a little insane doing so.

Just so you know,

Fellow Bus Rider

Dear Asian Chucky looking woman,

Please stop yelling, “Fuck you” to whomever you are talking to on the phone.

Ain’t nobody want to hear that and besides there are children on the bus.

Keep it PG Asian Chucky Woman and do yourself a favor and stop dying your hair orange.

It’s not cute.

Thanks,

Fellow Bus Rider

Dear Abuela,

I don’t know about you but drinking out of a maple syrup bottle ain’t foolin nobody.

Check yourself,

Fellow Bus Rider

Dear lady,

What in the world are you wearing?! Those big black trash bag are meant for trash and not to be worn as pants.

Hunny it’s 2013 and the decade for awful plastic parachute pants was left in the 90s for a reason.

Get with the time,

Fellow Bus Rider

Dear Girl that is clearly on her way to go out,

Please explain to me what you are going to do with a hair straightener at a club?

I understand you maybe in a rush, but sweetie there are no plugs on the bus to plug in your straightener. Then what are going to do at the club? Hang out by the bar or dj both while straightening your hair in your red bottoms?

Sorry but hunny that is ratchet and basic regardless of how fierce your shoes or outfit is.

From,

The Fellow Bus Rider

Dear very loud hand expression happy Latino,

Please refrain from poking me in the face while you are trying to talk to your friend who is sitting next to me.

Here is a thought, why don’t you move to the other seat next to you so your friend can sit next to you and you can poke him in the face all you want.

Just leave me out of it.

Thanks,

Fellow Bus Rider who doesn’t like to be poked

Dear Fragile Old Man,

As much as I want to feel pity for you that the bus driver isn’t stopping when you “ring the bell”, but I unfortunately lost that pity when you yelled and cried, “WHAAAAAAAAAA” like a 2 year old. 

Just because you are old and senile and life still doesn’t work out the way you want it to doesn’t give you “Crying Like A 2 Year Old” rights. 

You lost that when you turned 3 and now you are like 80+. Snap out of it and good God gurl get a grip.

That is all,

Fellow Bus Rider

Dear Suicidal Lady,

Why the hell are you running in front of cars for? I know you have to catch a bus and all, but lets be serious.

THERE IS NO BUS AT THE BUS STOP!

Chill your horses, and lets try not to get kill.

Thanks,

Fellow Bus Rider

Dear Lazy Bus Driver,

How dare you tell the person on the wheelchair that the bus is full when you have a bunch of young and able people sitting in the “senior and people with disabilities” priority seating! On too of that you don’t even do your job and secure the wheel chair properly.

You should be ashamed!

From,

Fellow Bus Rider

Dear Bus Rider,

Why waste a seat and place your book bag in a seat rather actually sit in the seat instead of taking up a aisle standing?

Either let someone else sit there or you sit there yourself.

Thanks,

Fellow Bus Rider